Leadership is not
friendship with authority.
One of my most useful leadership lessons came from waiting too long to make a people decision.
Early in my leadership career, I confused caring about someone with protecting them from accountability.
I delayed a decision I knew needed to be made. I wanted to give more time, more coaching and another opportunity. The intention felt humane. The impact was not. The delay affected the team, the standard and ultimately the person involved.
Care and accountability are not opposites.
A leader owes people clarity: what good looks like, where the gap is, what support exists, how progress will be measured and what happens if the gap remains.
Being liked can feel like evidence of good leadership. It is not. Neither is being feared. The standard is whether people know where they stand, believe the process is fair and can trust the leader to act when the organization needs action.
Kindness without clarity can become avoidance.
I still want people who work with me to know I care about them. I also want them to know that caring includes telling the truth early enough for it to be useful.